Third Annual Love and Fidelity Network Conference: Princeton, NJ

Last weekend, I had the pleasure of attending the Love and Fidelity Network's 3rd Annual Intercollegiate Conference on Marriage, Family, and Sexual Integrity. It was fantastic.

I love conferences. When people ask me what I want to do when I grow up, I say I want to change the world by restoring a marriage culture.

When they ask me how, I say through conferences.

Academic and family advocacy conferences are much more than a dissemination of information, although they are effective at that. They are much more than a gathering of academic experts and student leaders that are committed to change the world, although they are that as well.

The most important aspect of conferences, in my opinion, is that Conferences create community. They bring together people from every background and experience, and create a common experience. And for a few precious hours, we are pulled out of our too-busy-to-make-time-for-important-things life, and spend time with others who are committed to the same ideals we are. And the power of community and shared-vision is endless. The effects are long-lasting and, I am convinced, will change the world with the ideas, thoughts, and momentum they instigate.

Together we revel in and cling to our "outdated" ideas about the importance of marriage and family to society, and the centrality of sexual integrity to the flourishing of the human family. And this creates a great momentum, a ripple effect that will reverberate throughout individual lives, schools, and generations. Welcome to the marriage movement.

The marriage movement is a youth movement. I just read a pessimistic pole today about how nearly 40% of Americans say marriage is becoming obsolete. Among the demographic of 18-29 year-olds, the percentage shoots up to 44%. But guess what. That means that a majority of young adults think that marriage is important! (Why don't those newsflashes make the headlines?).

I am convinced that it is our generation of young adults that will make or brake the upcoming decisions about marriage in American. We are coming of age now, determined to change the world, and ready to act. Well, if you're waiting for an invitation, consider this it. It is up to us. It is on our shoulders to change the world. And we can. One life at a time.

Some highlights from the Love and Fidelity Conference:


Jason Carroll, a professor at BYU (and one of my thesis committee members) spoke on the need for friendship as the foundation for romantic relationships. He pointed out that we no longer live in a culture that postures for marriage, but rather a divorce-preparation culture. He emphasized that marriage is a formative institution wherein individuals best learn and grow, not the capstone of personal development. He touched on the need for the development of friendship and restraint of sexual behavior to form healthy relationships.

Christine Kim (my supervisor at the Heritage Foundation) presented a slew of findings on the decline of marriage in society, and other demographic trends, such as contraceptive use, and marriage rates among different educational demographics.

Dr. Donald Hilton, neuroscientist at University of Texas, spoke about the science of pornography addiction, and how it is undermining masculinity and men's achievement levels in society.

My favorite new addition this year was the student break-out sessions, where student leaders were able to share their experience with campus advocacy, along with their challenges and successes. This proved to be extremely motivating to hear from other peers. While the bar for involvement and impact was set high by leaders like Alisa Rogers and Casey Gleave, students also felt empowered to go forward and follow in their foot steps.

Of course my hero, Robert George, just popped in for a quick impromptu 20-minute lecture about the importance of gathering and standing up against wrong ideas. I love these people. I am so grateful for the strength they provide, and the shoulders for us to stand on.

If you would like recordings of any of these sessions, stay tuned, as most were recorded by the Love and Fidelity Network.

Thanks again for a wonderful venue and opportunity for learning, mentoring, and friendship.